What’s Your Dream?

Never has our mantra Dream. Plan. Do. mattered more than it will this year and in the coming years.

As I write this, I’m sitting at the very table where the dream of Lips & Hips took root. Here I sat nearly six years ago– a new mom, anxiously rethinking my purpose, my abilities, my capacity; my future. Deep down I felt scared and rebellious about this new identity. Having another human to care for was intimidating and my predominant emotion (besides sheer love) was fear. Yeah, I’d read the books and prepared the nursery and done all the ‘right’ things, but here I sat in a funk, the future cloudy, wondering what the hell had happened. It is hard to articulate the complex relationship between feeling like Wonder Woman and like you want to go somewhere in a corner to rock and suck your thumb. I felt it all.

12It took a couple years (and lots of therapy and growing through our work at Lips & Hips) before I realized that what had shook me back then was not being a mom necessarily, although it is the most challenging work I’ve done, but the reality that my life had changed before my very eyes and I had never slowed down long enough to ‘dream’ or envision what I wanted out of this next era in my life. Unaware, I’d allowed my new identity to be in direct conflict with my former dreams for my life. I’ve learned from the courageous and powerful women who participate in our leadership courses and events about the necessity of sisterhood and connection with other women. Our kryptonite is the sense of suffering alone. This life requires fellowship with other women along with support and accountability. It is in fellowship with the women we have met, and you, that I discovered my purpose; to help women birth the highest vision and purpose for their lives while becoming feminist change makers. Yes, I am a mom, a wife, an entrepreneur, an activist and I am a vision-midwife. I am in closest alignment with my highest calling when I am in service to other women.

That’s what the last five years and some months have taught me –my purpose. It’s why I feel compelled to share these lessons with hundreds of women each year and why we offer space, tools and coaching for women where they can too imagine their next phase of life, careers, relationships and importantly, their purpose. We offer a unique space to dream and it’s just for you.

Yet, the reality is that if you’re anything like me, there were certain moments in 2016 when I simply wanted to throw the hat in; quit life and try something else on for size. Dreaming was challenging last year. While 2016 brought tremendous career highs including a promotion at work, a huge speaking engagement in front of hundreds at the prestigious University of Michigan, two of our #Unstoppable lip gloss girls leaving for college and two new staff people at Lips & Hips (we are growing!), I also had four people quit over the course of the year (on my watch) and I was knocked out Muhammad Ali-style by the daunting responsibilities of managing work and life. There were lots of other failures throughout the year, but you get it.

On the personal front 2016 brought increased travel (which I love to do), wonderfully renewed friendships and continued personal growth, including going back to therapy. Sadly, the year included the loss of two dear family members (Jackie and James, I speak your name)Untitled and a major surgery that forever changes my ability to have more children naturally. It’s hard to dream in that headspace, right?

Oh, and Prince died in 2016. Followed by Carrie Fisher and George Michael (geesh, on Christmas day). We said farewell to so many other greats last year but his purple badness and Princess Leia’s’ loss were deep for me. Just like losing my former single, childless self years ago, they each held great significance to my youth and those formative years where sex, music and feminism took root in my life. Death this year hit close to home on so many levels. Damn, 2016.

And of course November rolled in and kicked me (and many of you) in the teeth. The election season reminded me that my black, full-figured, woman-self nor my beautiful black son meant two fucks to a huge part of this country. It’s hard to be in the abundant mindset required for dreaming in a year where bigotry, racism, xenophobia and sexism are ever more prevalent.

Yeah, 2016. I won’t especially miss you.

Yet, for all of the reasons I’ve shared thus far, we cannot relent.  Without vision, there is no hope. Dreaming is all about hope. Hope is the legacy of the Obama administration. If you’re lamenting the transition of the highest office in this land, then that’s all the more reason to imagine the impossible and run towards it. Even when it’s hard. Just the same way I sat at this table years ago, dreaming up my master plan I’m back here now. Our team is dreaming up an exciting year ahead too. You inspire me. The women and team at Lips & Hips do, too. That’s why we’re ramping up our activism even more now.

In 2017 our mantra is #bringit

This week we honor Dr. King and his courage to dream. We also salute the countless women like Katherine Gobel Johnson (go see Hidden Figures) who dared to dream, and the millions of women headed to the capitals in many states and to the nation’s capital of Washington, D.C. this weekend in defense of our dreams. We’re fueled by the work of Black Lives Matter and the women who bravely advance that work and those who rally for inclusivity for LGBTQ, disabled, Muslim and any other human perceived as ‘other’. We salute them and you, too. Brave, courageous, emboldened you.

In 2017, Lips & Hips is ramping up its activism in the best way we know how –we’re doubling down on our investment in women. We will
bring you even more of our popular Sista Supper series, you will see the launch of our self-paced journal; Dream, Girl, Dream and our first ever Lips & Hips podcast.  We’re planning and dreaming of increased lip gloss sales to power our work for girls and women and we can’t wait to feature more stories of our amazing sisters in the ongoing work of feminism and activism that we are devoted to.



Please join us as we advance the causes of girls and women. Add your dreams to ours. Follow up, share, engage in our work and help us be better.

Here’s to 2017, may your dreams be bigger, more bold and fueled by the comfort of knowing you are not alone.

Never forget, we’re here for all of it.

Yours in the work,



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